K-Fed’s New Year’s Day Wrestling Match

Jay Leno joked during his Tonight Show monologue on Thursday night, “Kevin Federline is going to wrestle the current WWE wrestling champ on New Year’s Day on pay-per-view. Yeah. I guess he decided he has a better future in fake wrestling than he did in fake rapping, apparently.”

K-Fed Competing In Pro Wrestling?

Conan O’Brien joked during his Late Night monologue on Monday night, “It’s been reported that Kevin Federline may be competing in an upcoming professional wrestling match. I can’t believe I’m saying this. But I expected better of professional wrestling.”

Leno’s A Witness For Snoop Dogg

Jay Leno joked during his Tonight Show monologue on Wednesday night, “Last night Snoop Dogg was a guest on the show. After he left he was pulled over and arrested. He had cocaine and marijuana on him. I’m a witness here. I can tell you that after he left he had none of that left. I walked by his dressing room. … He’ll be prosecuted under California’s new 10,000 strikes and you’re out law.”

Snoop Dogg’s Problems

Snoop Dogg 'Tha Blue Carpet Treatment'

Conan O’Brien joked during his Late Night monologue on Thursday night, “Snoop Dogg is having his problems, yup. This week, Snoop Dogg was arrested after his limo was pulled over, and police found cocaine, marijuana and a gun. Yeah, when police asked to see his I.D., Snoop showed them his cocaine, his marijuana and his gun.”

Three-ways Too Much For K-Fed

Conan O’Brien joked during his Late Night monologue on Friday night, “Kevin Federline is claiming that one of the reasons his marriage to Britney Spears failed is because she kept asking him to have a three-way with another woman, but he refused. Yeah. Wow. I knew he was lazy, but I didn’t know he was that lazy. ‘You and another woman? Ah, I don’t know. I’ve got Cheetos to eat.'”

K-Fed Can’t Afford Entourage

Conan O’Brien joked during his Late Night monologue on Friday night, “I got the latest on Britney. Of course, you all know Britney left K-Fed, and everyone’s worried about K-Fed now. It’s reported that Kevin Federline is now so broke, he can no longer afford his entourage. Yeah, folks, you know things are bad when a freeloader has to let his freeloaders go.”

How Creepy Is K-Fed?

Jay Leno joked during his Tonight Show monologue on Thursday night, “Oh, and you probably heard the sleazeball Kevin Federline is threatening to sell a a sex tape that he made of him and Britney Spears on their honeymoon if he doesn’t get more money from her in the divorce settlement. How creepy is that? How unbelievable? Boy, where is Bobby Knight when we need him? Huh? Please bring him in to slap this punk around a little bit. … And you know who I feel sorry for? Britney and Kevin’s kids. I mean, what’s gonna happen later in life when those kids grow up and find out they were not adopted?”

Democrats To Raise Minimum Wage

Conan O’Brien joked during his Late Night monologue on Tuesday night, “Democrats say now that they control the House and the Senate, they plan to raise the minimum wage. Yeah, the Democrats say they’re raising the minimum wage because something must be done to protect Kevin Federline’s future. Speaking of K-Fed, Sunday night — true story — Kevin Federline was performing a concert when he went off on his divorce and said, ‘F’ Britney.’ Yeah, fortunately, no one in the audience was offended because there was no one in the audience.”

K-Fed Name Change?

Jay Leno joked during his Tonight Show monologue on Tuesday night, “As you may have heard, Kevin Federline now changing his rap name from K-Fed to Al-Imony. I don’t know if you know that. … Well, today, Kevin Federline asked for sole custody of the children. Yeah, and in response, Britney Spears said, ‘Oh, my God! I thought you had ’em!’ … No, that’s true — he asked — he asked for custody of the children, and he wants sole custody ’cause he says he will be there for his kids. And I believe him. Hey, based on the last CD, he’s not going anywhere. Okay? He’s gonna be spending a lot of time around the house. … Hey, Kev, I’ve got a knock knock joke for you. Knock knock. [Kevin: Who’s there?] K-Fed. [Kevin: K-Fed who?] Exactly.”

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