Moby Talks Eminem — And Feeds Fat Joe

Moby was on Last Call with Carson Daly last night to discuss his ongoing troubles with . Later, stopped by to try out food from Moby’s vegan restaurant TeaNY before performing. For a rough transcript to those portions of the interview, read on.

Carson: I think everybody is probably thinking because of the whole
feud with eminem, it’s made you nervous to be out because now eminem —
a year ago, I think some remarks were made. A lot of people might have
had those same sentiments about eminem and his music and the things that
he’s said. It’s only been in the last year when “8 mile” came out that
he sort of won over the hearts of america. But it must be tough for you
to go out because he has these legions of fans that you might think want
to get to you.

Moby: Yeah. I don’t know. I’m not that worried about it, because I think
that — I don’t know. To be honest with you, I don’t really have any issues
with eminem. I think he’s obviously very talented, and he’s a really fascinating
public figure. So I don’t know.

Carson: What happened at the vmas? ‘Cause I saw you — last year, robert
smigel, who does the “triumph” bit did one with me. J.Lo was sitting in
front. I rehearsed it last year. I saw you this year, and I said, “what
are you doing?” You said, “I’m gonna do a bit with triumph.” And what happens
is triumph — people like moby are nice enough to let the dog jt rip on
him and stuff, you know, and have a good sense of humor about it. And that’s
what he started to do, and it looked like, from my ntage point where I
was sitting, that it just so happened to be when em was coming back from
accepting his award. So he was standing, like, four rows ahead of you guys’s

Moby: The people at mtv, it was sort of a comedic setup. They moved
me, and they put me a few seats behind eminem. So it was supposed to be
the same way. It was like a segue between basically the dog puppet insults
me, and then goes and then insults eminem. I think the problem was — and
I love triumph. If they d triumph’s greatest hits on dvd, I’d go out and
buy it.

Carson: They will in a week.

Moby: So when they came to me and said they wanted me to do a skit with
triumph, the insult comic dog, I knew what I was getting into. I knew that
it meant him saying really nasty things about me. But he’s funny, so of
course I went along with it. I think the problem was that maybe eminem
had a bad day? I don’t know him, so I can’t project, but maybe he’d never
seen triumph before, so he didn’t understand the nature of that, triumph
just insults people. He’s an insult comic dog. He kind of goes along with
the title.

Carson: Right.

Carson: Okay, so let’s move on ’cause I know you had a horrible flight
— where was your bad plane trip? To L.A.?

Moby: It was a rough couple of days. So I got beat up in boston, and
I go to san francisco, and we played a modern rock show.

Carson: Live 105 acoustic christmas or something?

Moby: Yeah. And with a bunch of bands who I like, but I really had no
business being in between them. I think we were in between disturbed, papa
roach, slipknot and sum 41.

Carson: Exactly.

[ Laughter ]

Moby: So, not surprisingly, the audience didn’t receive me all that
warmly. So I was, like, okay, I got beat up in boston. I go to san francisco,
and the audience hates my guts. I’m going to L.A., And L.A.’S warm. It’s
nice. I’ll get to the hotel. I’ll relax. We take off in san francisco in
the middle of a typhoon. The plane almost crashes. Finally we land in L.A.,
And I’m like, “okay, I just need to get to the hotel and relax.” We get
to the hotel, and it’s been taken over becae e they’re making an eminem

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Of all the hotels that moby goes, especially after all of this.

Moby: I must have had sex with a nun to create that sort of bad karma.

[ Laughter ] It’s just like one after another. I felt like rodney dangerfield.

Carson: Did you ever run into him or his people?

Moby: No, I mean, like I said before, I really have nothing against

Carson: What did you ever say initially?

Moby: It was the grammys a couple years ago, and I basically — I sort
of criticized eminem, but more just criticizing popular culture in general
for being overtly misogynistic and homophobic.

Carson: Do you regret any of those remarks that you made as you sit
here now?

Moby: I regret directing them at him because it was really more — I
was more criticizing popular culture in general.

Carson: But whose other music would have been considered misogynistic
and homophobic?

Moby: I’ve had enough trouble.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Just say a name!

Moby: There’s so much of it. Like, we all know who it is.

Carson: Did you ever think, “maybe I’ll just call em and just kind of
squash it.” Or just say, “look, it was a bad night. Or I had a bad day.
We’re different people. We’re going to run into one another at some point.
But I just want you to know this is where I’m coming from.” Et cetera,
et cetera. Would you want to do that?

Moby: I was always hoping this thing, it would all just blow over on
its own.

Carson: Right. Amazing how it lasted so long.

Moby: Yeah. It’s been great publicity.

Carson: Okay. Well, there’s one guy — if I was a restaurant owner,
I would love for him to be a loyal customer. Let’s bring him out.

>> You would either love it, or you would be terrified.

Carson: To try out some of your vegan food from your restaurant.

Say hi to fat joe, everybody!

[ Cheers and applause ]

Carson: All right, fat joe.

[ Laughter ] Just in case — let me preface this, fat joe’s not a vegan.

[ Laughter ] Are you?

>> Thank god I ain’t wearing my fur today, boy.

[ Laughter ] I’d have a beef with moby right now.

Carson: No more beef with moby. Let me start with you, fat joe. What
did you have for breakfast today? What’s your average breakfast? Describe

>> Turkey, bacon and eggs. Know what I mean?

Carson: Moby, what did you have for breakfast this morning?

>> I had a similar sort of breakfast, but the vegan version thereof.
In other words, a bowl fill of dirt.

Carson: All right, let’s dig in. Let’s start with something, moby. What
should we try first?

>> We have the turkey club from the deli downstairs.

Carson: Okay, that’s a regular turkey club?

>> A regular turkey club.

Carson: All right, fat joe, bite that just to refresh your memory of
what a regular turkey sub.

>> It’s got bacon on it, though. No, I don’t eat pork.

[ Laughter ]

>> Here’s a vegan —

Carson: What do you mean, you don’t eat pork?

>> Dude, I don’t eat pork. I’m sorry. I eat beef, chicken, turkey, you
know what I mean?

[ Laughter ]

[ Talking over each other ]

Carson: There might be something in there.

>> No, that’s vegan.

[ Laughter ]

>> I kinda like this.

Carson: It’s not that bad. It tastes like chicken.

>> It’s not supposed to be chicken.

Carson: It tastes all right.

>> This, it’s vegetarian ham and cheese.

>> Oh, come on.

[ Laughter ]

>> There’s no real ham in there.

Carson: That’s good. That’s not real ham. It just looks like it.

>> Not real ham, I promise. No, I promise.

Carson: What do you think, fat joe?

>> Tastes like ham, dude.

[ Applause ]

Carson: But it’s not.

>> Then we have a little vegan dessert.

Carson: Okay.

>> We eating a bunch of fake food right now, man.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: If moby came to your house for dinner, fat joe, what would you
make him? What’s the home cooking for you?

>> Some steak, potatoes. Nah, I’m serious.

Carson: Steak and potatoes. I’d eat that.

>> You ever eat chicken, and just then a bird is flying through the
window? It’s like, “damn, I’m eating a bird right now.” And the crispiest
part is the wings, right?

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Sometimes I’m eating like a hamburger, and I just think about
the cow out there chewing its cud, someone’s milkin’ it.

>> Excellent, my friend.

>> The dessert’s good.

>> No, it’s really good food, though, for real.

Carson: The dessert’s good. For a food substitute, this stuff’s doing
well. How’s the restaurant doi?

>> It’s doing really well, surprisingly, considering I know nothing
about owning a restaurant.

Carson: Better than britney spears, I see.

[ Laughter ]

[ Audience oohs ]

>> The difference is, like —

Carson: Like britney’s watching right now.

[ Laughter ] That’s pretty damn good.

>> Are they allowed to come up and have food?

Carson: I don’t care.

>> If anyone wants food, come on up and have some food.

Carson: Yeah, we’ll have some people come up. Moby, everybody. Thank
you very much, moby. Good luck with the restaurant, thank you.

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